English TPR briefings

[Litude]

I think "behoof" is a noun ("thy knowledge of the terrain shall work to thy behoof"), but that sounds weird to me. Also I'm not sure that's the correct meaning of "misdone" (I think it means "botched").

You're right. Both "thy knowledge of the terrain shall work to thy behoof" and "thy knowledge of the terrain shall be of behoof to thee" are short enough. Which one do you think sounds better?

And do you object to "thou shouldst keep any commoners from harm"?

Don't object to it, but I figured that misdone would give a more oldish feeling since since it is apparently an old way of expression the intention of harming someone in addition to the meaning it has of doing something improperly.

[Lewin]

I've never heard of the word behoof, it makes me think of a horse's hoof every time I read it But the meaning does sound appropriate.
Misdone doesn't quite feel right to me either, but that's just my opinion.

[Danjb]

You're right. Both "thy knowledge of the terrain shall work to thy behoof" and "thy knowledge of the terrain shall be of behoof to thee" are short enough. Which one do you think sounds better?

The former, I think.

Don't object to it, but I figured that misdone would give a more oldish feeling since since it is apparently an old way of expression the intention of harming someone in addition to the meaning it has of doing something improperly.

Ah, I didn't see that definition before. Seems ok to me, then

Do you think most of them are ready for voiceovers?

I'm just gonna take a look at the last two...

I do think "dispatched intelligence" sounds a bit too modern... What do you think of this:

  Code:

To thy weapons! Our spies have informed thee that thou art about to be made victim to an ambush by the dastardly rebels. Thy current position in the canyon giveth thee a major disadvantage in battle. Thou must needs quickly reposition thy stalwart troops and not let the scoundrels gain the upper hand or thou shalt not taste the joy that victory bringeth![/quote] And this: [code]Thou hast arrived at the final bastion of thine enemy. They have brought forth the last of their armies and ensconced themselves into their final retreat, in an attempt to gather together what little remaineth of their once powerful rebellion. Forsooth, the harsh weather hath frozen most of the river. Perchance this could provide thee with the opportunity to take thine enemies by surprise. Show no mercy to the obstinate rebels, that peace may reigneth once more![/quote] I'm not sure the rebels' efforts should be described as "hopeless", as it makes the mission sound less like a challenge and more like an obligation.

[Litude]

@Lewin: I still went with misdone after receiving approval by Danjb.

@Danjb: Great work one those changes absolutely, love them!

Made two minor changes:
"Our spies have informed thee that thou art about to be made" -> "Our spies have informed us that thou art about to be made"
Thought it sounded a bit weird that the briefer told you stuff you apparently were the first one to know anyway. "Us" is used in the TSK briefings as well.

"Show no mercy to the obstinate rebels, that peace may reigneth once more!" -> "Show no mercy to the obstinate rebels, that peace may reign once more!"
I think "reigneth" is wrong in this case, the -eth suffix (which is -s in modern English) should be added to "may" in this case, but since there's no "mayth/mayeth" conjugation there isn't any suffix at all. You wouldn't say "...that peace may reigns once more!" either, would you?

[Danjb]

@Danjb: Great work one those changes absolutely, love them!

Thanks!

"Our spies have informed thee that thou art about to be made" -> "Our spies have informed us that thou art about to be made"
Thought it sounded a bit weird that the briefer told you stuff you apparently were the first one to know anyway. "Us" is used in the TSK briefings as well.

I thought this too but I wasn't sure... nice one!

"Show no mercy to the obstinate rebels, that peace may reigneth once more!" -> "Show no mercy to the obstinate rebels, that peace may reign once more!"
I think "reigneth" is wrong in this case, the -eth suffix (which is -s in modern English) should be added to "may" in this case, but since there's no "mayth/mayeth" conjugation there isn't any suffix at all. You wouldn't say "...that peace may reigns once more!" either, would you?

Hehe, I guess I got carried away. Again, wasn't really sure, but good job!

Seems like we're nearly done here?

[Litude]

EDIT: Scrap that, no idea what got into me.

I'd say we're finally done!

[Lewin]

I'd say we're finally done!

Great! Thanks for rewriting them guys.
As soon as this update to the Remake is released (within a few days) I will have another go at reading them. I think I'll also improve my voice for the rogue because every time I hear it in-game I am embarrassed by some of the files... :oops:

If I don't post about it within a week, someone please poke me

[Lewin]

So here's my latest attempt at reading them: (16 mb)
http://lewin.hodgman.id.au/temp/day2.rar

Mission 1: I'm happy with the text, as long as I'm pronouncing belave correctly Especially the last 3 or so recordings sound good to me.

Mission 2: I'm really not liking "push them back to that from whence they came". It doesn't flow nicely and feels like way too many words or something... What do you think?

Mission 3: I've never heard of that usage of "hinds" before. I pronunced it the same as "hind quarters" meaning the rear of an animal like a horse. And did I pronounce caitiff correctly?

Mission 4: No problems with the text.

Mission 5: Ditto

Mission 6: At this point you can see that my voice is dying and I said a few words wrong here and there. I'll do them again next time but I thought these might still be good to hear how the text sounds when read. I don't have any problems with it.

Please let me know what you think.
Lewin.

[Litude]

Great stuff, can't help you with the pronunciation stuff though but some feedback nonetheless:

Mission 1: I think take 7 is the best, sounds really good
Mission 2: I guess that part could be replaced with just "push them back to whence they came", but I think it sounds alright. Like take 4 the best.
Mission 3: There was an error in this script "renegade rule" should have been "renegades' rule". You seem to have fixed this yourself in take 3 though.
Mission 4: I like take 4. Take 2 is also good.
Mission 5: Take 4 is great.
Mission 6: I like take 1 the best, sadly it has the problem with you slipping and saying "thy last battle have"

These are light-years ahead of the original ones, no doubt!

[Lewin]

Time to don the headset and get some more recordings done. Missions 1,3,4,5 are final, I agreed with your opinions and used those ones.
- Mission 2: I have changed it to "push them back to whence they came" because it sounds a lot better to me.
- Mission 6: I think take 4 is good so I stopped recording new ones.
- Mission 7: I like take 2.

Download:
http://lewin.hodgman.id.au/temp/day3.zip

Once again I stopped when I thought my voice was starting to wear out. Mission 9 might need redoing, see what you think. I should be able to knock the last 5-6 over in one go, maybe even tomorrow I look forward to your feedback.
I still haven't trimmed the start and ends of these files so they're not ready to include yet. When they're all chosen I go through them all and do that.
Lewin.
P.S. The pronunciation just keeps getting harder "Iwis succeeded" always became "Iwissucceeded" and I had to confirm the pronunciation of a lot of words.

[Litude]

Mission 2: Take 6 is great.
Mission 6: I agree, take 4 is good.
Mission 7: Yeah, take 2 is good.
Mission 8: I think take 3 is good.
Mission 9: I think both take 1 and 2 are good. Having a bit of trouble deciding which one is better, guess take 1 might be slightly better.

[Danjb]

Sorry I'm late!

They're all really good by the way. It's really hard to say which ones are best!

Day 3

Mission 2: I like takes 4 and 6
Mission 6: I think take 4 is best
Mission 7: I like 2 and 3
Mission 8: They're all good!
Mission 9: I don't remember seeing "iwis" in there before! But the way you pronounce it seems natural, so that's good. I agree that 1 or 2 is best.

Great work!

[Litude]

On a weekend leave from the army now, just thought I'd say that I'll be able to finish the English patch on another weekend leave just fine once the voices are done.

[Lewin]

Thanks for the feedback guys. I have made a folder called "final" with the best one for each mission.

On a weekend leave from the army now, just thought I'd say that I'll be able to finish the English patch on another weekend leave just fine once the voices are done.

Thanks for letting me know, I'm glad to hear that. I'll do the final recordings and upload them soon, and maybe see if I can get some of the TPR soldiers done.

[Lewin]

I FINALLY recorded the last 5 TPR briefings. I have included the ones we chose from missions 1-9 as well as the new 10-14 recordings. Please give me feedback on which ones you like, and if you think any of them need to be redone.
Download: (17 MB)
http://lewin.hodgman.id.au/temp/TPR_Bre ... eb2012.rar

Once they're all selected, I'll trim the start/end of each recording, normalise the volumes and post the final download here as high quality WAVs.

Not sure when I'll get to the soldier voices, probably not until the next uni holidays at least (April)
@Litude: If you want to release SR3 without them, I'm okay with that. I'll still make them to be used in the Remake/future TPR patches when I have time and can con my friends into recording voices for a day
Lewin.